


Tonight, You Belong to Me

by blueboyjohnny



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Character Study, Heartbreak, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-01
Updated: 2019-03-01
Packaged: 2019-11-07 07:05:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17955860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueboyjohnny/pseuds/blueboyjohnny
Summary: Ten loved Lucas and nothing could really change that.





	Tonight, You Belong to Me

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this fic while i was sad one day and i had planned to write something like this for a while now. its not that sad and i tried to make it more poetic, tell me if i succeed ;)

Ten knew what he was getting into the very first time he laid down with Lucas. He said no homo every time they parted for air but proceeded to be the best fuck of Ten’s life. They knew of each other, grew up in the same social setting, but ran with different crowds. Lucas was the straight frat boy that got good grades despite partying every weekend. Ten was a snobby gay that was barely keeping his grades up. They were friends in private but had never met in public. Ten preferred it that way, back then at least. 

Ten liked Lucas, even though Lucas considered blowjobs from guys not gay. He was kind, super smart, and the gentlest soul he had ever met. There weren’t many people like him around anymore and Ten was dying to keep him. 

Lucas was big, big hands, big eyes, big ears, a big smile. People could consider him overwhelming. He made Ten feel small, something he had never been before him. When he wrapped his arms around his waist, when he held his hands, when he fucked into him at night, or when he left for half a year. Ten could consider that smallness intoxicating. After pretending to be big, as his father suggested, pretending to be worth more than he was, pretending the expensive shopping sprees weren’t adding up, he needed someone to make him small again. Bring him back down to his size. 

When Lucas took off, it was out of the blue. Everything Lucas in his apartment was gone, the only thing left was his scent and the letter stuck to the bathroom mirror. _I have to sort somethings out_ was all it said. Lucas blocked his number and him on every social media platform. Then Ten spots him in the tabloids walking down the street holding hands with his supposed girlfriend. 

The media lied and that was a proven fact, but Lucas’s disappearance and his silence was the truth. 

Him and Ten weren’t officially anything, not boyfriends, friends was used lightly, and everything they did was done in the dark. Ten didn’t have the status Lucas had. No one knew but him that Ten was a liar. His father was going bankrupt and using his savings to fake like everything was fine. Ten wanted to think that Lucas leaving had something to do with his past, but it was more than that. Anyone could’ve seen it was more than that. 

Somewhere in between the last year of college and fishing his dad’s company out the drain, he fell in love with Lucas. He certainly didn’t mean to and by all means, loneliness makes you do some regretful things. Ten doesn’t know if Lucas was lonely too or if he was just simply that sweet, but he indulged Ten in such a way that you couldn’t blame him for falling in love. 

He snuck him to movies, answered every text with record speed, kissed him slowly and fucked him hard. How was Ten supposed to interpret these things? The gifts, the longing looks, the quiet nights of just holding each other, was he really wrong for thinking Lucas could love him back. He didn't even get to tell him before he left, but no matter how stupid people said Lucas was he could be very perceptive. 

Ten sits in the loveseat tucked in the corner with a glass of scotch in his hands. The only sound was the white noise in his ears and the only light was the lamp by the couch. Lucas had texted him 30 minutes ago asking if he could see him, after a year of no contact. Ten said yes, not for closure, but to his see his face one last time. 

Ten was never tame, but now he felt like a dog on a leash. Trapped outside waiting for its owner to come home. He tried to move on several times but no one could make Ten feel how Lucas did. The hope that he would come back with his arms outstretched and an I love you on the tip of his tongue kept him waiting like a good boy. 

He didn’t want to be drunk when Lucas arrived, but he didn’t feel like he could handle this sober. He knew one day Lucas would go off and get married and he wanted the best man title if he couldn’t play bride. 

A knock on the door silences his brooding. With a heavy heart, he rises from the couch and makes his way to the door. With every step his heart beats faster, causing him to feel antsy. Lucas could’ve just punched in the code, it wasn’t like Ten had changed it, but maybe that was too personal for people who haven’t seen each other in almost a year. 

He swings the door open after a few deep breaths, but the air rushes out of his lungs as soon as he sees Lucas. Face to face for the first time in months and Ten can’t stress the time apart enough. It felt like years and his knees almost give out when he steps aside to let Lucas in. His hair was shorter, he was a little buffer, and it smells like he changed his cologne. There was none of his usual joy and his eyes didn’t sparkle, Ten hated those moments when you knew everything was about to change. 

“Good to see you,” his voice was just as deep as Ten remembered it, his tone though, was professional and distant.

It was great to see him, he’d been wishing for him for months. He wishes it was all different that they loved on the same page. He wanted Lucas to see how much Ten had loved him, how much Ten still loves him. 

“Yeah, its been awhile,” Ten answered. “Have a seat, do you want anything to drink?”

“I’m fine,” was his curt reply and, right, they weren’t boyfriends and friends could only be used lightly. 

He takes a deep breath as Lucas takes a seat on the chair in the corner. Ten resumes his position on the loveseat once the lights are on. Lucas shines different in the light, time was sweet to him, he aged better than wine. He still looked like that 20-year-old frat boy playing soccer in the main courtyard. 

“So, how are you,” his tone was too polite for a man who knew all of Ten’s ins and outs. 

Lucas was everything to Ten at one point. They had no reason to be unfamiliar with each other a year wasn’t enough time to erase all they had. Lucas had learned how to make Ten shiver, smile, and scream. How to make his whole body ache the next day and even if he complained they both knew he loved it. He knew what ticked Ten off and how to pick him up when he would fall. Lucas was love in every sense of the word, but Ten just simply wasn’t what he wanted, maybe. 

He finally feels angry and like a bad dog Ten barks, “cut the bullshit Lucas, say what you came here to.”

And Lucas jumps like Ten’s the biggest baddest dog in the yard. “I’m sorry, really sorry, I couldn’t feel the same as you. I knew loved me, but I was too selfish to stop.”

With shaking hands Ten reaches for his glass, the scotch was watered down from the melted ice, but he ignores the taste and finishes off the glass. He wanted to yell _no asshole you loved me back, you wouldn’t do those things for people you don’t love._ Lucas was so sweet, the gentlest soul he had ever met, he probably would. 

“I’m getting married and I needed to clean this up.” 

Lucas stands and walks over to Ten. He takes the other half of the loveseat placing just enough space between them. Ten catches a whiff of his cologne and he prefers the new scent. His head was hazy from the lies and the alcohol and the little dignity keeps him from laying his head on his chest to breath it in. 

“I love her and it’s different,” his eyes shine as he speaks. Ten recognized that sparkle from when Lucas would speak about the beautiful things in life, about the things he loved. 

“I’m excited to spend the rest of my life with her, it’s all I ever wanted.” 

Lucas takes Ten’s hand into his own, his small one seemed to fit so perfectly. Ten was told once docile didn’t look right on him and he agreed. With Lucas involved, if he said roll over Ten would roll over, if he said sit Ten would sit. He’d always have that effect on him. The warmth of his hand in Lucas’s makes him melt. The tension on his body rolls right off and the hand holding the glass almost let's go. 

Lucas tells him about his fiancée with vigor. Love wrapped around every word and passion in between every sentence. Questions run through his head, was he the side piece or was she, why did he go back to China, was this even really love?

He looks up at Lucas, he staring at him expectantly. He had stopped talking and Ten didn’t know when he realizes he had said so little during this entire exchange. Was Lucas here to ask for Ten’s blessing, or maybe for Ten to let him go. 

Ten sets his glass on the table and let’s go of Lucas’s hand. He reaches up and takes his face into his hand. He leans in searching Lucas’s eyes for any sign that he should stop. He stops, their face an eyelash brush apart, and drags his thumb across his temple. Ten’s heart races like it hadn’t in months and yes this was love just not the healthy type. 

“Just, just one more time? Lucas,” he whispers pushing Lucas back onto the couch climbing on top of him, “I’ll let you go after that. I promise.”

Lucas could push him off, Ten was no threat. He was half his weight and height, but Ten felt power he hadn’t in a long time trapping Lucas to the couch. Lucas swallows and Ten watches his Adam apple bob. He feels his chest rise and fall and then a hand placed on his hip. 

Ten was selfish, born and raised to get what he wanted, but whether Lucas wants this one more time or leaves right now Ten will let him go. Lucas should leave, his future wife was probably waiting for him. 

“One more time.” Lucas whispers and Ten can’t ignore the way his chest sails and then sinks. 

Lucas was never good at telling anyone no, especially Ten and Ten never wanted to feel small for anyone other than Lucas.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading, it truly warms my heart. luten really grew on me and its one of my fave ships now. 
> 
> follow me if you wanna discuss nct, i need more friends *crying emoji*
> 
>  
> 
> twitter


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